Monday, January 14, 2008

save me.
i wouldnt mind not having a job, really.
hahahhahahah.
but.
rahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
please i hope i get some email replies soon.
if not i wonder how long im gonna continue to be nagged at.
how about sevenmonths?
hahahahah.
therere a million things to pickon me abt when im doing nothing in particular, ie lazing around. (okie maybe you'd say there would still be things to pickon me abt even if i were to have things to do..rahh)
but my mama keeps asking me to packmyroom packmyroom packmyroom.
pack somany times alr.
ookie but i admit i only choose certain tiny areas to pack eachtime hahahah.

ohwell somehow i am loving this freetime i have though at times it feels wayyyyTOOfreeeee.
ive never felt so icandoanythingiwantish.
but ive never felt so errm, lazy before?
i feel like some super buwuzhengye haochilanzuo person.

i miss school!
i miss choir!
i miss 401 too, i do, regardless of how inanimate hoho.

yummyjoeypearl, IM GOING TO FORGET HOW YOU GUYS LOOK LIKE ALREADY LA.

and hellooo to miss prissygan my fellow unemployed(: hahahahah. its ok, you can continue tagging since uve alr tagged once and it cant be removed ayway! hahahahah. hope you find a job soon(:

illusion-

Friday, January 11, 2008

finished the book today.

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
so depressing.
i wonder what would have happened if anna didnt die..
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
))))):
i literally ahhh-ed and huhhh-ed when i was towards the ending..
))))):

Labels: mysisterskeeper.

illusion-

Wednesday, January 09, 2008

one saturday morning, the door to the girls' bedroom is ajar; i knock gently. 'want to go to the mall?'

kate shrugs. 'not now.'
i lean against the doorframe. 'it'll be good to get out of the house.'
'i dont want to.' although i am sure she does not even realise she is doing it, she skims her palm over her head before tucking her hand into her back pocket.
'kate,' i begin.
'dont say it. dont tell me that nobody's going to stare at me, because they will. dont tell me it doesnt matter, because it does. and dont tell me i look fine, because thats a lie.' her eyes, lashbare, fill with tears. 'im a freak, mom. look at me.'

i do, and i see the spots where her brows have gone missing, and the slope of her endless brow, and the small divots and bumps that are usually hidden under a cover of hair. 'well,' i say evenly. 'we can fix this.'

without another word, i walk out of her room, knowing kate will follow. i pass anna, who abandons her colouring book to trail behind her sister. in the basement, i pull out a pair of ancient electric grooming clippers we found when we bought the house, and plug them in. then i cut a swath right down the middle of my scalp.

'mom!' kate gasps.
'what?' a tumble of brown waves fall onto anna's shoulder; she picks them up delicately. 'its only hair.'

with another swipe of the razor, kate starts to smile. she points out a spot that ive missed, where a small thatch stands like a forest. i sit down on an overturned milk crate and let her shave the other side of my head herself. anna crawls onto my lap. 'me next,' she begs.

an hour later, we walk through the mall holding hands, a trio of bald girls. we stay for hours. everywhere we go, heads turn and voices whisper. we are beautiful, times three.

-an extract from my sister's keeper by jodi picoult.

this is so beautiful.....

illusion-

Monday, January 07, 2008

"for you, a thousand times over."

illusion-

Sunday, January 06, 2008

那阳光 碎裂在熟悉场景 好安静
一个人 能背多少的往事 真不轻
谁的笑 谁的温暖的手心 我着迷
伤痕好像都变成 了曾经

全剧终 看见满场空座椅 灯亮起
这故事 好像真实又像虚幻的情境
只是那 好不容易被说服 的自己
藉口又顶不住懊恼的侵袭

好后悔 好伤心 想重来 行不行
再一次 我就不会走向这样的结局
好后悔 好伤心 谁把我 放回去
我愿意 付出所有来换一个时光机

对不起 独自回荡在空气 没人听
最后又是孤单 到天明

真的痛 总是来的很轻盈 没声音
从背后 慢慢缓缓抱着我 就像你
你和我 还有很多的地方 还没去
为何留我荒唐的坐在这里

doyourmbmeplayingthepreludeforyou?

illusion-