Tuesday, February 26, 2008

sometimes we get so tired and afraid,
and thought perhaps its time to seek refuge back in the warmth of our homes..
only to discover how harsh and cold the air can be..

i need you to understand.
i need you to listen.
you think you are always right, because you think I THINK IM ALWAYS RIGHT.
thats not true.

why do we always assume?



im really tired from work.
ive been making so many mistakes, im hating it.
its not the job..
its just the fact that many a times my mistakes have to be answered by others..
feels horrible.
really.

things are so different.
i guess its all about being responsible, not just to myself now..

im sorry...
i really am..
but sometimes i feel like ive so overused the word that im no longer fit to use it anymore..
im afraid that to others it might have sounded insincere in any way..
i guess it would since ive used it so many times..
sigh.
but i really am.
and i know im giving so much trouble..
argh.
):

i wonder how much longer i can manage..
hang in there chen xiuqi..
live on, octopus-kite-worm-blackie spirit.
[:

illusion-

Friday, February 08, 2008

HELLOHELLOHELLOHELLOHELLO(:

i have a job now.
hahahahah.
oh well.
it came with pretty much a lot of sacrifices to be made though..
):
im finding time to squeeze in my music lessons and math tuition.
but the thing is my shifts will change weekly..
i dontknow..
):
i want to learn my music.
i really do..
i dontknow.
i cant possibly just stop working though.
boooooooooo.

anyway.
i still cant quite believe im working.
chen xiuqi.
working.
i guess the thing i most dread is lunching alone!!
)))))))))))))):
i hate it very very very much.
very!!
i'd rather not eat..
ok but i did, oneandahalftimes cos i was really hungry.
but the half came when a really nice friendly girl came to join me when i was halfway through yay(:

but.
church.
thats another major problem.
the biggest problem i guess.
i dontknow.
pray.

reunion dinner was lovelyyyyyy.
but again, if only everyone could be present..
i miss my relatives in hainan veryveryveryveryvery much.
my parents are gonna abandon us and visit them soon.
THIS SPELLS TROUBLE. LAUNDRY HOW. BREAKFAST LUNCH DINNER HOW.
)))):

erm actually its the firstday of the lunar new year today, so i guess i should stop flooding this post with saddies.
heres a big smiley for this er, happy day.
(:

oh btw, ive actually finished reading timetravellerswife.
it seemed pretty confusing at the start, but after that it was alright..
i just found it a tad too sexual, so it kindof reduced my liking for it a great deal.
but the storylines quite moving..
meaningful stuff in it too.
yeap.

im currently reading thekiterunner.
im scared.
im foreseeing a very sad ending.
i mean.
i watched the movie.

ok bye.
(:

illusion-